The study described in this article collected naturalistic data from six children aged eight to nine talking with their relatives and friends. The article focuses on directives and requests used by the children and their interlocutors in informal conversations. It proposes that – as previous research has found – some requests and directives are distinctive because of the children’s social status as children, but also suggests that, since ‘being a child’ is a relational and socially negotiated role, its significance varies across different interactions.