This is the first rather large-scale inquiry (N = 429) based on an online questionnaire and written interviews to explore whether language and cultural distinctions within cross-cultural couples make emotional communication more arduous. Obstacles like perceived restrictions in the Foreign Language (LX), lack of emotional resonance, and lack of sincerity at the start of the relationship, blurred in months for more than three quarters of participants. Longer relationships induced affective socialisation in the LX and the partner's language frequently became the language of the heart. The speed and depth of this affective socialisation in the LX was related to multicultural personality traits and gender, with female participants mentioning more problems in communicating emotions and feeling less genuine at the start of the relationship. This gender difference passed off over time. Female participants were also more likely to assume their partner's language.